Interrogation Song
The Interrogation Song is a song from Muppets Most Wanted where Sam the Eage and Jean Pierre ask the Muppets questions about the stolen art. Lyrics :Sam: Kermit, let's begin Describe the day you played Berlin :Constantine (pretending to be Kermit): We rehearsed and then we walked about We ate bratwurst and sauerkraut :Jean Pierre: That night, at 10:03 Were you inside the portrait gallery? :''Constantine: From 10:00 to 10:04 Was when we did the show's encore'' :''Sam: Hm, frog, we've got our doubts Can you confirm your whereabouts?'' :Constantine: My alibi is watertight The audience saw me sing all night :Jean Pierre: Monsieur, we know you did the crime :Constantine: I was onstage that whole time Ask who sang Rainbow Connection''.'' :Sam and Jean Pierre: Thank you, Kermit! No more questions! :Jean Pierre (spoken): Hello! I think it's time for good cop/romantic cop. :Miss Piggy, you cleaned up lock inside Now's your chance to save your hide :Miss Piggy: Oh, gentlemen, I did not know It's a crime to steal the show :Sam: Tell us how the art was taken :Jean Pierre: If you want to save your bacon :Miss Piggy: I haven't seen your missing art All I stole was audience hearts :''Sam: We can give you a plea deal'' :''Jean Pierre: All you have to do is squeal'' :''Miss Piggy: I'm not a thief, I don't know how All I've ever taken is a bow'' :Jean Pierre: We'll catch the swine that did this job :Miss Piggy: Give up the pig puns, creep! Go jump in a lake, that's my suggestion! :Sam and Jean Pierre: Thank you, Piggy! No more questions! :Jean Pierre (spoken): I think she likes me, no? :Sam (spoken): I don't think your puns are helping the investigation. :Jean Pierre: You know, I think they did it :Sam: No, they didn't! :Jean Pierre: Yes, they did, and we can pin it :Sam: If they did, how did they do it? :Jean Pierre: If they didn't, how did they didn't? :Sam: If they didn't, then it's easy 'Cause they simply didn't do it :Jean Pierre: If they did it, then I knew it But we've nothing that can prove it! :(spoken): Ahem. Oh excuse me. Bring in the purple guy with the schnoz. :''Sam: Do you remember what you did On the night you played Madrid?'' :''Gonzo: I was hit by a raging bull And rushed off-stage to the hospital'' :''Jean Pierre: Gonzo, what do you know About the sculpture theft at Madrid's Prado?'' :''Gonzo: I never saw the stolen bust I spent the night in bed concussed'' :''Sam: The truth, Gonzo, the clock is ticking'' :''Gonzo: If you don't believe me, ask the chicken Camilla was there, she'll cooperate'' :''Jean Pierre: Madam, are you willing to corroborate?'' :''Camilla: (clucking)'' :''Sam: Will somebody get this chicken out of there?'' :''Gonzo: Calm down, Camilla, it's a routine inspection'' :''Sam and Jean Pierre: Thank you, Gonzo! No more questions!'' :Jean Pierre: Let's go from the start What do you know about the stolen art? :Lew Zealand: I didn't know there was a plan :Dr. Teeth: Your accusation's far out, man! :Dr. Bunsen Honeydew: The chances of us committing a crime Are less than .009 :The Swedish Chef: (Faux-Swedish) :''Jean Pierre: To help with our investigation Can you do a full translation?'' :''Translator: What the chef just said to you was "Shnoopdy-shnoopdy-shnoo." It's not Swedish'' :Animal: (grunts and laughs) :Penguins: (quacking) :Fozzie Bear: Uh, I can do an Elvis impression :Sam and Jean Pierre: Thank you, Muppets! No more questions! :Jean Pierre: They didn't :Sam: No, they didn't :Jean Pierre: There's no way they did the crime :Sam: They couldn't, they're too stupid :Jean Pierre: They're not criminal masterminds :Sam: We do not know who did it But we know they didn't do it :Jean Pierre and Sam: So we know who didn't do it Yes, we know who didn't do it! :Jean Pierre (spoken): They're incapable of being culpable. Trivia *Sam and Jean Pierre also interrogate Jeffrey, Jaden and the other members. Category:Songs Category:Disney Songs